Basement Dweller

O.k. to my graduates in the recession I know you're feeling the blow to the market. I have to say this, keep your head up. It's easier said than done. You want to know why? Well, for one I have uprooted out of my home state to Chicago only to feel like I'm STILL not doing shit. Yes, I am a writer and we live a lifestyle that's pretty free, even bohemian in some cases. I write from the downtown public library which is the craziest place to get work done. There are so many different things going on from a someone amping on a librarian for a frozen computer to the stranger who decided it was a good idea to tap me on the shoulder to say, "GOTCHA!" Yea that really did happen. Anyway, at the moment I feel like a total loser. I'm definitely not getting paid for what I do. I often beat myself up because I've opted out of going to graduate school. For some reason I feel I can make it by just doing what I love without formal training.

On my days off from a part-time retail job, they are work days. This is where I write in my journal, search for jobs, work on my resume, and click the refresh button on my email hoping a new networking opportunity will change the number on my inbox. It's a sad thing, but it is the life I live. Oh to feel even more like I loser, I'm staying with my family. It sounds smart because I don't have to really struggle. I have to say I feel pretty damn worthless when I have yet another day off and can't fill it up with anything else. I've decided to use this blog, to strenghten my writing and God help me a fan base. Now my blog is also a column for The P3 Power Boost, a professional women's magazine. I think it's quite appropriate for young people who feel like they're alone in the struggle to find work. Even if it doesn't get to someone like myself at least I know it's getting read.

So whether you're with the 'rents or a family's place, staying with 5 roommates, or alone living in what looks like walk in closet, you're not alone. I was told that this is the time where I'm really free to do anything. Then I thought about my bank account, yea right. However, it's not all about money (in the long run it is), but while I don't have kids, a mortgage, or a spouse I can do whatever I want. I can go hang out at all hours, work for free, and change my mind on anything.

I keep telling myself that this is a great time in my life, but why I do feel like such a bum?

Chicago, Chicago

I moved to Chicago 3 months ago, this is city is my New York. I fell in love when I visited my family when I was 13 for a month out of my summer. I come from a small North Carolina city (maybe it's just a big town) of roughly 25,000. It was a culture shock with the variations of attractions from the extravagant architecture of the Smurtif-Stone building to these "big city" houses converted into apartments. There was a sense of comradery that I feel didn't exist in northern major cities. I still remember the smell of Lake Michigan and the lovely cool chill I felt down my spine as I sat outside eating lunch with my friends at camp.

During Christmas break in my senior year of high school I made trips to museums and Art Institute where I became deliciously overwhelmed with artistic wonder. I even smiled in the unforgiving Chicago winter wind.


In my final trip, before I made the bold move to the city, it was my junior year in college. I was old enough to venture out on my own and I felt a sense of independence that differed from dorm life. The world, well the city at least, truly felt like my oyster. I could go anywhere and do anything because for that Spring Break I was a city girl. As I hailed a cab to meet up with my uncle so we could take to the Metra home I thought, 'This is it, I'm moving to Chicago.'

I've never been to New York and I would like to visit, but I think moving there is out of the question. It is The city to make dreams come true or at least attempt to. From t.v. I've found it to be magical with Madison Square Garden's Christmas tree and the Statue of Liberty steadfast a late-night rainstorm. All of these things I fear are ploys that will eventually lure me there and the flashing lights will blind me or burn. I've heard of the dirt and grim, the sketchy neighborhoods, the rude people, the ridiculous rent. For what? That little piece of magic portrayed in photo shopped pictures and the wealthy exiting in their town cars to Upper Eastside apartments.

Before I get mauled by self-proclaimed New Yorkers, it's the perfect place for YOU.
I'm glad to say I didn't get fooled by Chicago. I came in knowing about the rough edges like the crime, it happens everywhere. Sure, there are neighborhoods where it's a little more dangerous and more frequently the random acts of crime.

It's not has large as New York, but it's big enough for me. It's more Southerner-friendly, meaning I can get away with saying 'hello' to a stranger. I've found a tourist spot that brings me peace, The Crown Fountain. As it gets cooler fewer people sit near it, but I like to stop and watch the faces. The way the facial lines settle on the smiles of these strangers, who eventually spit water onto unexpected admirers.

Now that I've moved to Chicago I get to live my dream. I've learned to move at a downtowners pace, swift and determined. Everyone has somewhere important to go and now that I'm not visiting I do too. I'm slowly discovering the young adult Chicago, which I believe is hidden in free sponsored concerts, swanky hotel bars, and house parties by invitation only. Come on to my city and see how great it is.

So there you have it a rant on the city that never sleeps and the city that gets slept on.

LIFE ON THE MENU

Today's Special: Fired (Fried) Oysters in Fondue and ARTtichokes


First, I don't have an major bills (you know the ones that will have you homeless or without a vehicle). So if you have lost your job and living at home with your parents say what I said 'I'M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!'

I never realized that my life was beginning to be centered around my job until Friday morning when I woke up feeling sad damn near depressed. Then I pumped the breaks! 'Lauren 'Wilder' Wilder why are you stressed out?' Sure, I'm entitled to the initial shock and sadness of not having anything to fill those 8 hours of the day. But that's where everything stopped. And now I have a question to ask you, if you didn't have your job what would you be doing?


What was looming over my head at work were all the things I wanted to do but couldn't do. I can't skip town because I had to be at work 7:30 in the morning. I can come and go as I please as long as my funds will allow it.

I'm not going to get into the things that I have in the works. However, I will say I'm touching up my art roots so that I don't go to waste.



I'm not 100% optimisstic, more like 80%. Life is much easier if you have something to look forward to. Also keep in mind that life doesn't come to a halt with a relationship, marriage, and even kids. And for goodness sake do not wallow, you look crazy and no one will want to be around you.

Now if you're thinking well I have a second job, I sleep in my free time, I have a boyfriend/girlfriend, or even I have kids. No excuses people to neglect the things you like to do. If you only have 15 minutes to dedicate to it then do it. Don't end up jobless and reevaluating your life. Your job isn't your life! What do you retired people do? Vacation, hobbies, visit friends, and you young person are not an exception.




Are you worried about no one being around for the fun? Hold on just a sec.


Server: I'll get your dessert.


Since I said that work shouldn't define your life, your friends shouldn't either. They're fabulous and you are suppose to share your activites and common interests. If you are depending on them to make your life interesting then shame on you. In some cases friends may be all you have and that's fine but you come into this world alone and you die alone. No, that's not sound sour, but it's the reality of it.