Fill in the Void

If you're working a part-time job when you should be working 40 hours a week then you can do this. Right now you might be feeling pretty miserable because you don't have any money or feel useless because your job isn't what you want. Get up and find a volunteer opportunity, it's a great resume builder, adds character, and you meet great people.

It sucks when you're wasting away to "One Life to Live" and fully conscious of it. Eventually it will eat you alive because you are capable of doing something spectacular. I currently volunteer maybe once or twice a week depending on my energy level in order to keep myself sane. Yea, yea, I know I'm not making any money and it's free labor. Actually, I'm not doing anything that is strenous and I have the option of leaving. I like the people where I volunteer and I like the cause, HIV/AIDS.

Volunteering has allowed me to meet people in Chicago that I wouldn't on my daily trek to the CTA Red Line. It fills in time that I might be wasting away in front of the t.v. or in bed sulking feeling like the most insignificant person on the planet. You get the point.

Sure, I could be hunting down another part-time job, my mother made a good point two part-time jobs don't equal benefits. My quest and mission is to find a full-time job, but until then I'll be filling it in with directing phone calls and clients. Also, you'll see some great changes coming to my blog; I'll be adding a new feature which will be profiles of intriguing and inspiring individuals in Chicago. I'm working on my story lines and I think you'll enjoy. Even better, these stories will be videos :)


Now, go help save the world or do what you love for free.

Happy New...oh I'm early

I think my new favorite holiday is New Year's because it brings hope. Every year I either write in a ratty marble notebook or have a conversation with God around midnight.

I was doing my job search I thought of the scene from Sex and the City The Movie as Carrie is rushing over to Miranda's. The most original version of "Auld Lang Syne" was playing and I thought to myself damn this holiday is either spent heaving over a toilet bowl or at home eating Chinese watching the ball drop. I thought of the words to the song and the feeling I get every time I hear it. A song of remembrance. The year isn't quite over yet, but I have a lot to reflect on and to hope for.


New Year's Eve reminds me that things can be new again, but not be forgotten.


"We twa hay pedilt in the burn,
fray mornin sun til dyn;
But seas between us bred hay roard
sin ald lang syn."

Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger

I have to say I felt like I've vanished from the radar for the past couple of weeks maybe more. I'm adapting to change and doing MORE serious thinking (it never ends I swear). I tried to picture myself once again doing something other than being a story teller and an open book to my life, nothing seems to fit.

I spoke with a lady who I want to be my mentor and she said something that has stuck with me. "You're going to have to make your own way." Meaning, I will have to create my own opportunities. At first it was empowering that I have total control over where my career is going to go and then I got scared. Yes, I'm still scared. What if I slack off (guilty as charged)or even take the "easy" way out? But then I said to myself "Self, do you feel like you're growing at this very moment?" Myself said "No." Now, this means I have to constantly work towards what I want. I don't have anyone cracking the whip on me because I am an adult and I make my own decisions.

If I want to get anywhere in life I have to be more than willing to put the work in. I had an acquaintance back in college who used say "No days off." I used to call him crazy for pushing and going all the time. Now it makes sense you didn't get anywhere by taking days off. When I go to work, it's not even work, I do that so I can get around town and get my necessities. The real work comes in when I rest my screaming feet as I beat the keys trying to make my next move.

My previous post is actually about the same thing, but without references. I'm coming clean and being honest with myself. As much of a dreamer and a pusher I am, I do fall off the wagon. I slack off and forget what am I doing and why, but once you hit that hard ground you hop back on.

So, I have to make a promise to myself and to my readers. I, Wilder, promise to update my blog at least weekly because it is important to my well-being and career.


Have you fallen off the wagon today?