This blog post will be about race, one of the most controversial topics to discuss in any American social setting. I thought I was comfortable with discussing this, but I found out today that I'm not.
I was in the lunchroom this morning at work prepping my bagel and one of my coworkers, we'll call him Joe, walks in and asks me how do I like the snow. I'll tell you right now that I'm from North Carolina and we have flurries and the whole place will shut down, but not in Chicago (business as usual). So, I told him I don't like the snow. Sure, it's pretty from the inside of your house but actually walking in it to get to work, eh not cool. Joe responds, "What is that a black thing?"
Car crash, train wreck, record screeching.
Yes, that's what he said. I pretended that I heard him wrong and just said "No, I do not like the snow. I'm Southern we don't know what to do with snow." He proceeds to add fuel to the fire "Well my black friends don't like snow." And I said, "It's a Southern thing."
That put a serious damper on my morning. Mainly because I was caught off guard, singled out, and didn't expect someone to have the audacity to say some bullshit like that, to my face. Now, I'm not sure who's reading my posts. I will say this if you've never been a minority I want you for a second to think of a time when you were the only one that looked like you in a room. Got it? Now, think about it if your life was like that every day what you see on t.v., your coworkers, and strangers on the street.
Do you still feel the same? If the answer is yes, then I'm not surprised because chances are you'll never know. I don't like to be put on display, be the token or caricature. Imagine any time you get put in a setting where you stand out people want to ask you questions like you're from a different planet. For a minute you might feel special and may continue to like it, but then there's that one moment where you'll feel alone. Then all you want to do is crawl in a hole to hide.
Still drawing a blank?
Bitch, I'm human and I have feelings too.
12.07.2009
Fill in the Void
If you're working a part-time job when you should be working 40 hours a week then you can do this. Right now you might be feeling pretty miserable because you don't have any money or feel useless because your job isn't what you want. Get up and find a volunteer opportunity, it's a great resume builder, adds character, and you meet great people.
It sucks when you're wasting away to "One Life to Live" and fully conscious of it. Eventually it will eat you alive because you are capable of doing something spectacular. I currently volunteer maybe once or twice a week depending on my energy level in order to keep myself sane. Yea, yea, I know I'm not making any money and it's free labor. Actually, I'm not doing anything that is strenous and I have the option of leaving. I like the people where I volunteer and I like the cause, HIV/AIDS.
Volunteering has allowed me to meet people in Chicago that I wouldn't on my daily trek to the CTA Red Line. It fills in time that I might be wasting away in front of the t.v. or in bed sulking feeling like the most insignificant person on the planet. You get the point.
Sure, I could be hunting down another part-time job, my mother made a good point two part-time jobs don't equal benefits. My quest and mission is to find a full-time job, but until then I'll be filling it in with directing phone calls and clients. Also, you'll see some great changes coming to my blog; I'll be adding a new feature which will be profiles of intriguing and inspiring individuals in Chicago. I'm working on my story lines and I think you'll enjoy. Even better, these stories will be videos :)
Now, go help save the world or do what you love for free.
12.06.2009
Happy New...oh I'm early
I think my new favorite holiday is New Year's because it brings hope. Every year I either write in a ratty marble notebook or have a conversation with God around midnight.
I was doing my job search I thought of the scene from Sex and the City The Movie as Carrie is rushing over to Miranda's. The most original version of "Auld Lang Syne" was playing and I thought to myself damn this holiday is either spent heaving over a toilet bowl or at home eating Chinese watching the ball drop. I thought of the words to the song and the feeling I get every time I hear it. A song of remembrance. The year isn't quite over yet, but I have a lot to reflect on and to hope for.
New Year's Eve reminds me that things can be new again, but not be forgotten.
"We twa hay pedilt in the burn,
fray mornin sun til dyn;
But seas between us bred hay roard
sin ald lang syn."
